Tuesday, May 31, 2005

Whatever...

What a night last night! Fell asleep whilst watching a tape of the
European GP and woke up for the last lap - just in time to see Kimi go
flying! Woke up again at 0535 to find a huge spider on the wall next to
my bed staring at me, so I threw it out the window! Also, I spent the
whole night dreaming about the same person - she was even driving my
Fork Lift at one point!

Spent much of today fucking about being bored - see earlier post! Then
put my In-Dash MP3 player into my Sister's car as I've blown the
speakers in mine so can't use it, and I certainly can't afford new
speakers! Also finally put what I used to call 'The Rogue's Gallery'
onto the site, with a couple of new additions - thankfully not mine this
time (touch wood!).

Anyway, gotta have a shower before work tomorrow, might even shave but -
I doubt it!
--

Monday, May 30, 2005

Bank Holidays

I'm bored! I even transferred 310 photo's over to my PC from my
Mother's, and I'm still bored! On that score, expect some of the Pics to
make it to the Site...

As I like a few of Faithless' Tracks I downloaded the new "Best of..."
today, it's quite good, recommended!

Hope my Fucking dinner's ready soon, I'm getting hungry! (Spoilt Brat
Alert!)

Crazy Frog is Number 1 - eat that Krisse!
--

Sunday, May 29, 2005

Blind Man

Q: What did the blind man say when he walked by the
fish market?

A: Hello Ladies!

--

Friday, May 27, 2005

The History of the 'F' Word

Do not follow link if easily offended, or if there are small children around - and turn up your speakers! It may take a while to load too...

History of The 'F' Word....
--

Mumblings...

Krisse has informed me that he will not be continuing with Krisse
Worldwide <http://www.krisseworldwide.com> anymore due to lack of time,
so I've been thinking about starting up a group 'Blog that 'Approved'
users (ie my friends and family) can update via email under the teamBBS
banner, I think it would be cool, but would I be the only one who uses
and updates it?! Thoughts please...
--

Thursday, May 26, 2005

Someone...

...PLEASE buy me a Nissan 300ZX Twin Turbo!
You don't realise how much I need one! 

Wednesday, May 25, 2005

12 Points to Ponder

12. Life is sexually transmitted.

11. Good Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

10. Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an
erection, make him a sandwich.

9. Give a person a fish and you feed him for a day; teach a person to
use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

8. Some people are like Slinkies .... not really good for anything, but
you can't help smiling when you see one tumble down the stairs.

7. Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals
dying of nothing.

6. Whenever I'm feeling blue, I start breathing again.

5. All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention
to criticism.

4. Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a
substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents.

3. In the 60's people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world
is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

2. Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come
to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first

1. And, most "terrorists" are reported to have come to the US legally,
but they then hang around on expired visas, some for as long as 10 to 15
years. Now, at Blockbuster Video if you are 2 days late with a video,
those people are all over you. So, why isn't Blockbuster in charge of
immigration?

Fucking Cars Episode II: The Bill

Finally getting my Ka back in the morning, and have to hand over
£452.14! A few words of advice from Leo "NEVER BUY A FORD"
--

Sunday, May 22, 2005

Monaco GP

Finally finished watching the race, started watching it on my lunch break at 1300 at work, and watched the rest in stages over the course of
the evening. A good race it was, too. Loads of action and a double
Podium finish for BMW Williams. Can't understand why Schumacher wasn't
penalised for blatently crossing the Pit Exit line on lap 59 - perhaps it's
something to do with the type of car he's driving.......
--

Friday, May 20, 2005

And So....

...It is complete. Good, it was.
--

At Last

I'm about to leave to see the 1330 showing of Star Wars Episode III, it
better be fucking good.......
--

Fucking Cars.....

I am so pissed off right now, my Ka is in for it's MOT, I already knew
that it was going to cost around £300 as it needed a new Steering Rack,
however the Garage has just phoned and asked if anyone has done any work
on the steering previously as the 'Union' is missing and someone has
used PVA Tape, his exact words "Someone has had a play with it at
least". The Ka has NEVER had any work done on it's steering, which can
lead me to only one conclusion, which I can't tell you as I can't prove
it and don't want to get Sued! Oh, and the upshot of this is an extra
£128 + VAT. Approx £450 for an MOT on a car I don't even like! Cunts.

Thursday, May 19, 2005

Away In A Manger........

Away in a manger, no crib for a bed;
The little Lord Jesus sat up and he said...:

"Fuck off Swindon, Fuck off Swindon, Fuck off Swindon"
--

Wednesday, May 18, 2005

Welcome to the Ultimate Questionnaire

Nickname(s)- Leo, Skippy, The BBS, Leeroy and countless others

Favourites:
Food-  Lamb
Band- Metallica 

Candy- Cheeky Monkeys from Asda   
Drink- Stella Artios
Stuffed animal- My England Bear
Underwear- Star Wars boxer shorts
Shirt- only have T- shirts and Football shirts, my favourite is Oxford Utd's away shirt
Pants- jeans

Movie-  The Matrix

Least favourites:
Pet Peeve- Grammatical and spelling errors
Band- The Rasmus
Song- Lonely by Akon
Person- No Comment

celebrity - Rachel Stevens' Boyfriend!!!!!
Movie- The Perfect Storm


About yourself:
Eye colour- Blue
Hair color- Brown with ginger beard
Height- about 5'8"
Shoe size- 10

Number of piercings and tattoos- Two Tattoos - Metallica and Oxford Utd; used to have my Eyebrow pierced


Random-
Today you- Realised - again - how beautiful someone is....
You feel like- Going to bed
You want to listen to- Iron Maiden

You went- Work
You saw- Mum, Dad, Nicola, Nick, Neil, Julie, Richard, John, Craig, Mark, Matthew, Barry, Leanne and a few others!

First thing you saw/did/said/listened to today:
Word- Morning
Song- Iron Maiden 'Ghost of the Navigator'
person- Mum
Show- Rides
Touched- probably my knob
Typed-Travis

Last thing you saw/did/said/listened to today:
Word- God (as in "Oh My....")
Song- Iron Maiden 'Out Of The Silent Planet'
Person- Nicola
Show- Red Dwarf IV
Touched- My Hand
Typed- Hand

A quick test...

Have you ever purchased something from Co-op or Iceland? Yes, I used to work for the Co-op
Have you ever worn Burberry check? No
Have you ever purchased a KFC family bucket? Yes
Have you ever hung a pine fresh tree shaped air freshener on your rear view mirror? Not personally, but my Omega had several already there when I bought it!
Is your mobile phone on a "pay as you go" tariff? Yes
Have you ever gone to Pizza Hut on a date? No
Are you into "R&B"? I like some, not all
Have you ever eaten corned beef stew? No
Have you ever worn jewellery from 'Elizabeth Duke' at Argos? Never worn Jewellery
Have you ever looked into Ciro Citterio for a suit? ?? What?!
Have you ever eaten a pot noodle? Had a mouthful of one once - never again!
Do you call your Grandmother your 'Nan'? Used to, yes
Have you ever bought fresh cut flowers from a petrol station as a present? No
Have you ever bought second class stamps? Yes

Have you ever knowingly bought own brand cola? Yes

Do you think Marks & Spencer's food hall is too expensive? How would I know?!

Have you ever taken a Stenaline Ferry anywhere? No

Have you anything in your wardrobe which is at least 50% polyester?  Yes
Do you dream of souping up your car and getting a spoiler? Not anymore
Have you ever owned a pair of white Reebok Classic trainers? No
Would you eat own brand baked beans? I don't eat  Baked Beans

Do you prefer Carling to Stella? No, Stella all the way
Have you ever referred to a sofa as a 'settee'? Yes
Do you consider Jordan to be "actually quite intelligent"? Not bloody likely!
Have you ever relieved a hotel room of its freebie shower gel or shampoo? No
Have you ever drunk a can of lager you found on a train? No
Have you ever offered to buy a cigarette from someone? No, Smoking is stupid
Have you ever brought a screw top bottle of wine to a dinner party? Wine? Do I look like a poof?!
Have you ever referred to pudding as "dessert"¨ or "sweet"? Yes
Do you own those socks that are cut off below the ankle so it looks like you aren't wearing any? Yes, otherwise when I wear shorts, I can't wear socks and my feet cry stinky cheer
Have you ever removed a boiled sweet or gum and saved it for later? Yes, hasn't everyone?
Do you know anyone that has been on "Trisha"? No
Have you ever referred to a loo as a "toilet"? Obviously, most people do
Have you ever worn a football shirt while not playing sport? Yes, most days
Have you ever bought a garden ornament from B&Q, ie stone squirrel, ornamental wheelbarrow etc? No
Can you name any characters from Footballers' Wives? No
Have you ever put up a flashing snowman or fairy lights outside your house at Christmas? No
Have you ever bought your lunch from Benjy's? Where?!
Do you have more than three buttons on any of your suits? Um, haven't worn a suit for years
Have you ever visited a Little Chef or Happy Eater apart from to use the loos in desperation? Yes
Have you ever cut out and used money off coupons from magazines? No
Do you have 'tea' as your evening meal? No, I have Dinner
Are the toes on your shoes square?  Well they ain't fucking pointy!
Do you know any men who wear earings? Yeah, loads
Has your mobile phone ring-tone ever been a Top 40 hit? No, my ringtone is the Cantina Band
Was your education paid for by the tax-payer? Yes


The Final Leg
   LAST PERSON WHO...
x. Slept in your bed:  Other than myself,  Gemma
x. Saw you cry: I tend not to do that
x. Made you cry: See Above
x. Spent the night at your house: Other than the people who live here, Nikki The Kid
x. You shared a drink with: Nikki, Rob, Paul and Dai
x. You went to the movies with: Gemma
x. You went shopping with: Nicola
Yelled at you: Mum for saying Fuck
x. Told you they loved you: Gaynor!

HAVE YOU EVER...
x. Gotten in a fight with your pet: Not a real one, I leave that up to Nicola...
x. Been to New York: No, although I have had the chance to go, I'm just not that fussed.
x. Dreamed something really crazy and then it happened the next day: No
x. Had an imaginary friend: Of course

RANDOM
x. Red or blue: Blue, I'm Oxford, it wasn't gonna be fucking red was it?!
x. Spring or Summer: Summer, I live five minutes from the Sea!
x. Are you bored: Getting there, this is dragging on a bit
x. Last noise you heard:  The clacking of the Keys as I'm typing

x. Last time you went out of the country: early March 2005, Gemma and Krisse's birthdays, went to England to help celebrate
x. Things you like in a the opposite sex: Intelligence, looks, sense of fun,  the same everyone else does, surely?!

x. Do you have a crush on someone: Oh yes

x. What book are you reading now: Book?!

x. Worst feeling in the world: Being told your Dad won't live through the week...
x. What is the first thing you think when you wake in the morning: What day is it?!
x. Future daughter's name: Stella!
x. Future son's name: Leo
x. Do you sleep with a stuffed animal: No
x. If you could have any job you wanted, what would it be: some form of driving I think
x.Are you a lefty, righty: Righty
x. What's under your bed: Chest of drawers, a load of old records, a sleeping bag and a steering wheel for PS2

x. Favourite sport to watch : Formula1 and Football

x. Siblings: 1

EXTRA STUFF
x. Do you do drugs: No, Extra Strong Mints get me high!
x. Do you drink: Not as much as I used to
x. Who is your best friend: Too many to mention....
x. What are you most scared of: Dying alone
x. What clothes do you sleep in: underpants
x. Who is the last person who called you: Matthew
x. Where do you want to get married: Who said I want to get Married?!
x. Favuorite number(s): 12
x. Do you have a job:Obviously
x. Do you like being around people: Depends on who, and what mood I'm in
x. Best feeling in the world: Driving along the M4 at 145mph - what a buzz!
x. Are you a health freak: I weigh 17 stone and it's all fat - work it out for yourslef!
STUFF
x. Have you ever loved someone you had no chance with: Yes
x. Want someone you don't have right now: Yes
Are you lonely right now: A little, sometimes
x. Ever afraid you'll never get married: Who said I want to get Married?!
x. Do you want to get married: Depends on who I meet in life
x. Do you want kids: Part of me does, part of me doesn't

IN THE LAST 48 HOURS, HAVE YOU...
x. Cried: No
x. Bought something: Yes, food at work
x. Said "I Love You": Yes
. Met someone new: No

x. Talked to someone: Yes, loads of people!
x. Missed someone: Yes
x. Hugged someone: No
x. Dream about someone you can't be with:  Yes

x. had a lot of sleep: not a great deal, no!

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

Star Wars Horoscope





Star Wars Horoscope for Cancer




You may whine at times, but you've developed a thick hard shell (like that of a crab).
You are strong willed and persistent - until you get what you want.
You never shy away from a fight, even when things get dangerous.
Mentally sharp, you are starting to master the elements of mind manipulation.

Star wars character you are most like: Luke Skywalker

Monday, May 16, 2005

Freudian Slip

Two men are talking in the bar sharing their sob stories.
One man says, "I had the worst Freudian Slip the other
day."

The other man responds, "What is a Freudian Slip?"

"You know, it's when you mean to say one thing, but
you say something else that reveals what you are really
thinking about. Like the other day I was at the airport
and this really beautiful lady was helping me. Instead
of asking her for 'two tickets to Pittsburgh', I asked
her for 'to Pickets to Tittsburgh."

The second replies, "Oh, now I know what you are talking
about. It's like the other day when I was having breakfast
with my wife. I wanted her to pass me the Orange Juice,
and instead I said, "YOU RUINED MY LIFE BITCH!"

Saturday, May 14, 2005

Irish Brothers

An Irishman walks into a bar in Dublin, orders three
pints of Guinness and sits in the back of the room,
drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes
them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more.

The bartender asks him, "You know, a pint goes flat
after I draw it; it would taste better if you bought
one at a time."

The Irishman replies, "Well, you see, I have two brothers.
One is in America, the other in Australia, and I'm here
in Dublin. When we all left home, we promised that
we'd drink this way to remember the days when we drank
together."

The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and
leaves it there.

The Irishman becomes a regular in the bar, and always
drinks the same way: he orders three pints and drinks
them in turn.

One day, he comes in and orders two pints. All the other
regulars notice and fall silent.

When he comes back to the bar for the second round,
the bartender says, "I don't want to intrude on your
grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your
great loss."

The Irishman looks confused for a moment, then a light
dawns in his eye and he laughs. "Oh, no." he says, "Everyone's
fine. I've just quit drinking."

Friday, May 13, 2005

Farewell Wanny, Brown and Cox

Although that is slightly misleading, as Cox hasn't left, but has been
told that if he can find a new Club, he's free to go. Wanless and Brown,
are not having their contracts renewed, Danny Brown not having had the
best of times at Utd, being injured for much of it. I'm a bit sorry to
see Paul Wanless leave, always liked him as a player, but needs must,
and I'm sure Brian Talbot knows what he's up to! Good Luck lads.

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of The Sith

I have just finished watching Episode I: The Phantom Menace, and within the next week I shall watch Episode II: Attack Of The Clones in preperation for the arrival of Episode III on the 19th May. I plan to watch it in Swansea on the 20th May with Nicola, and then again several times with whoever wants to see it! I'm so excited! I FUCKING LOVE STAR WARS!

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

For Those Born Before 1986

According to today's regulators and bureaucrats, those of us who were kids in the 60's, 70's and early 80's probably shouldn't have survived, because our baby cots were covered with brightly coloured lead-based paint which was promptly chewed and licked. We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, or latches on doors or cabinets and it was fine to play with pans. When we rode our bikes, we wore no helmets, just flip-flops and Fluorescent 'spokey dokey's' on our wheels. As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or airbags - riding in the passenger seat was a treat. We drank water from the garden hose and not from a bottle and it tasted the same. We ate chips, bread and butter pudding and drank fizzy juice with sugar in it, but we were never overweight because we were always outside playing. We shared one drink with four friends, from one bottle or can and no-one actually died from this.

We would spend hours building go-carts out of scraps and then went top speed down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into stinging nettles a few times, we learned to solve the problem.

We would leave home in the morning and could play all day, as long as we were back before it got dark. No one was able to reach us and no one minded

We did not have Play stations or X-Boxes, no video games at all.

No 99 channels on TV, no videotape movies, no surround sound, no mobile phones, no personal computers, no DVDs, no Internet chat rooms.

We had friends - we went outside and found them.

We played elastics and rounders, and sometimes that ball really hurt!

We fell out of trees, got cut, and broke bones but there were no law suits.

We had full on fist fights but no prosecution followed from other parents.

We played knock a door run and were actually afraid of the owners catching us.

We walked to friends' homes.

We also, believe it or not, WALKED to school; we didn't rely on mummy or daddy to drive us to school, which was just round the corner.

We made up games with sticks and tennis balls.

We rode bikes in packs of 7 and wore our coats by only the hood.

The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke a law was unheard of...They actually sided with the law.


This generation has produced some of the best risk-takers and problem solvers and inventors, ever. The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas. We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned how to deal with it all. And you're one of them. Congratulations!


Pass this on to others who have had the luck to grow as real kids, before lawyers and government regulated our lives, for our own good.


For those of you who aren't old enough, thought you might like to read about us. This my friends, is surprisingly frightening......and it might put a smile on your face:

The majority of students in universities today were born in 1986........They are called youth.

They have never heard of We are the World, We are the children, and the Uptown Girl they know is by Westlife not Billy Joel. They have never heard of Rick Astley, Bananarama, Nena Cherry or Belinda Carlisle.

For them, there has always been only one Germany and one Vietnam. AIDS has existed since they were born. CD's have existed since they were born. Michael Jackson has always been white. To them John Travolta has always been round in shape and they can't imagine how this fat guy could be a god of dance. They believe that Charlie's Angels and Mission Impossible are films from last year. They can never imagine life before computers. They'll never have pretended to be the A Team, RedHand Gang or the Famous Five. They'll never have applied to be on Jim'll Fix It or Why Don't You. They can't believe a black and white television ever existed. And they will never understand how we could leave the house without a mobile phone.


Now let's check if we're getting old...

1. You understand what was written above and you smile.
2. You need to sleep more, usually until the afternoon, after a night out.
3. Your friends are getting married/already married.
4. You are always surprised to see small children playing comfortably with computers.
5. When you see teenagers with mobile phones, you shake your head.
6. You remember watching Dirty Den in EastEnders the first time around.
7. You meet your friends from time to time, talking about the good Old days, repeating again all the funny things you have experienced together.
8. Having read this mail, you are thinking of forwarding it to someone.

Monday, May 09, 2005

Alarming...

Well, my alarm woke me up no problems this morning. Have spent most of my day with ear plugs in as some guys came in to start work on our Drainage system, they were using a huge Diesel powered saw to cut through the concrete so that tomorrow when the rest of the crew come in, they know where to dig. I've never heard such a noise! I might update again later as I'm currently getting changed after getting home from work.........

Late Nights, Early Mornings...

So, last night after I wrote on here I went to bed, was about 0100, but stayed awake to watch the Grand Prix Qualifying and the BTCC highlights that my Dad taped for me. Checked that my alarm was set for 0500 so I'd get up for work, and finally went to sleep at about 0230. woke up at 0516 wondering why my alarm hadn't gone off, and look at the clock - the alarm was turned off. I assumed that I checked the time but didn't actually turn the alarm on. Got to work at 0532 - only two minutes late! Spoke to Nic, Mum and Dad about it when I got home from work and they all said they heard my alarm going off, and heard me get out of bed and turn it off (I have to get out of bed as the clock is the other side of my room). This did not happen whilst I was awake, and I am slightly concerned by this! Anyway, I'm going to bed now, and my alarm is set - and definately turned on - to go off at 0625. Hopefully it'll wake me up in the morning, I'll let you know...........

Saturday, May 07, 2005

A Quick One Before Bed...

I've read through the first 13 (of 109) pages of BAR's 'Case' and so far have found it to be perfectly reasonable and honest, of course it all depends on the Case of the FIA. I can't help but feel it's all a part of the backlash to the GPWC, and that the other Teams should perhaps be on guard!
 
Not too sure what to think of the latest developments down at the KasStad, I obviously hope that Brian Talbot is the man to take the Team forward and wish him all the best for that, but something isn't right there....
 
I downloaded the first episode of Family Guy Season 4 today, can only hope that the rest of the new episodes can be a little better. Perhaps it's just down to the anticipation of the new series after it was originally cancelled, but I was disappointed when I watched it. Krisse, if you want a copy, let me know and I'll email it to you......

Friday, May 06, 2005

3pm Press Conference, Kassam Stadium

Oxford United are pleased to announce the appointment of Brian Talbot as Manager.

Brian brings a wealth of experience to the role, with over 600 games as a manager at West Brom, Rushden and Diamonds and Oldham Athletic, as well as close to 700 appearances as a player for Ipswich, Arsenal, Watford, Stoke, West Brom, Fulham and Aldershot. The 51 year old also won six full caps for England.

Brian is the man who guided Rushden to promotion from The Conference and then built a side that won the Third Division in 2002/3, losing just seven times and playing bright attractive football. He then joined Oldham, where he guided the club away from relegation in his first season before leaving by mutual consent in February

Brian was unveiled as United's new manager at a 3pm press conference at the Kassam Stadium.

Oxford Utd's End-of-season Party

The usual end-of-season story at Oxford Utd. Managerless, players out of contract and no word from the chairman (although there is a 'statement' being made at 3pm today). Fan's protests are planned for tomorrow's game against Chester. It's a fucking shambles.

Good Luck BAR Honda

1030hrs, 6 May 2005, Barcelona, Spain: In the wake of the decision of the FIA’s International Court of Appeal yesterday and having considered the extraordinarily complex legal framework, a summary of the legal position is as follows.

B.A.R Honda has looked at all practical ways of immediately challenging the decision. The central issue is one of jurisdiction. Jurisdiction in Europe is governed by European-wide rules, which say that a defendant party has a right to be sued in the territory in which it is based. Upon receiving the best legal advice in all relevant jurisdictions, the conclusion is that nothing can be done to enable the team to race this weekend.

B.A.R Honda has considered whether to pursue further action which might enable it to compete at Monaco. On balance, the team has decided that to challenge the sport’s governing body would cause a level of disruption and damage to the sport which would not serve the best interests of everyone involved. B.A.R will be discussing the ramifications of the Court of Appeal verdict with the other teams and manufacturers involved in the sport.

The FIA International Court of Appeal in its own judgement was unable to prove that the team acted in bad faith. B.A.R Honda therefore remains unclear as to the basis for such a severe penalty. The team vigorously contests any insinuation that could potentially tarnish its reputation and good record, something that is of fundamental importance to the whole organisation and its partners.

In an effort to provide the greatest possible visibility to the outside world of its case, B.A.R Honda today will publish its entire submission to the FIA International Court of Appeal on its website for anyone interested to examine it. This dossier will be available in English for viewing and download via BARHondaF1.com this afternoon

Thursday, May 05, 2005

Homicidal Rampage


 
Your Homicidal Rampage! by crash_and_burn
Your name:
Weapon of Choice: Sex
Your Favorite Target: Women
Your Kill Count: 1,582,084,467
Your Battle Cry: "Who let the dogs out?"
Years You Spend in Jail: 16
How Much Money In Damages You Cause: $200,242,038,039,750
Your Homocidal Insanity Level:: 90%
Quiz created with MemeGen!
 
 

A New Beginning....

Hello, decided to move my 'Blog to my own site, just seems cleaner somehow. Will still use the other one, but very rarely, as this one offers a lot more features, such as: Email updates; anybody can comment on entries; and obviously the fact that it's hosted on my own site!

Currently listening to the Chemical Brother's latest Album - which I downloaded this afternoon, so far so good but I'm only on the second track!